speak in riddles

i thought i had it all figured out.

the space created will open up a new direction for me.

now everything's blown up right in my face.

and everyone else is happy.

not me.

never me.

right now, it feels that i made this decision to make mistakes again.

because i never figured it out.

i was hoping against hope that i will understand.

but i still don't.

fuck, i have to.

i want to be optimistic enough that i will learn from this.

damn.